Cultural expectations based in the concept of men as "hunter-gatherers" have reinforced an idea that equates the ability to provide with bringing value to a partnership or family. Professional and financial setbacks, along with the understandable stress caused by the latter, can color their perception of their marital health as well. Unaddressed depression or anxiety can cause someone to see aspects of their life-including their relationships-in a way that doesn't necessarily reflect reality (substance abuse does this too, Bobby adds). That can lead two spouses living under the same roof to start living separate lives: "They sleep in different beds, have different schedules, don't discuss their inner lives, have different friends, and simply no longer look to each other for much of anything anymore." Consider the possibility that it may be you, not your wife. "When people are voicing resentments, when they're being hostile, when they're communicating-badly, but still communicating-that they have hurt or fear related to their relationship, they still have a chance."īurying resentments, instead of voicing them, can lead to an irreparable distance. Why Fighting in a Relationship Is NormalĪrguing in a respectful, productive way can be a positive sign, Bobby says, because it means both spouses still care.Not arguing is a bigger red flag than fighting. They miss the easy, fun passion their relationship once held." "They often crave the level of interest, attention, and affection they see their wives lavishing on their children. "What I've often seen in my marriage counseling and couples therapy practice is that men are more likely than women to feel emotionally neglected by their partners," Bobby says. True as that may be, it's not uncommon for a husband to feel like he's become his wife's last priority. All of which they feel increasingly cut off from." Or, her role as a mom has left you feeling neglected.įor those with kids still living at home, parenthood is a round-the-clock responsibility-and studies still show that moms still put in more time than dads, on average. ![]() ![]() ![]() "Male anger tends to be rooted not in frustration over tasks and responsibilities, but in a longing for love, fun, meaning, and a desire for a deeper connection with their partner. "However, men often carry an equal, or sometimes even higher level of anger and resentment towards their spouses," Bobby says. Bobby points out that many wives resent their husbands because "they often feel frazzled, frustrated, and resentful about the higher level of mental energy and material energy they are expected to devote to their household, career and families." That can leave her little room for some soul-replenishing me-time, let alone you-and-she time.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |